So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Randomize
