It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
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