i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
