Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Randomize
