you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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