I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
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