And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
