____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
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