I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
