I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize