Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
