smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
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