it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
