I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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