it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
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