So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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