Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
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