I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
I'm passing your future prison.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
