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• (206): View more from Washington

  Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.

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• (647): View more from Ontario

  a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.

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• (970): View more from Colorado

  i take joy in having bigger boobs than others

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• (414): View more from Wisconsin

  I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours

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• (224): View more from Illinois

  It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'

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• (775): View more from Nevada

  I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.

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• (337): View more from Louisiana

  After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.

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• (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?

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• (909): View more from California

  When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?

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• (206): View more from Washington

  Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.

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• (250): View more from British Columbia

  i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was

  (1-250): View more from British Columbia

  Thats why they were on the balcony!

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• (812): View more from Indiana

  Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee

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• (616): View more from Michigan

  EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help

  (630): View more from Illinois

  My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help

  (630): View more from Illinois

  This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can

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• (989): View more from Michigan

  the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.

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