i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
why is half of my head shaved?
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