Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I'm determined to sit on that face.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
