oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
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