saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
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