I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
Barsexuality is the new black.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Randomize
