Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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