Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
I am mentally ready for anal.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
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