I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
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