Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
