so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
