I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Randomize
