I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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