Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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