We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I DEMAND FORESKIN
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