This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
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