Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I would fuck him just for his dog
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
