we're blogging at a bar
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
