dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Randomize