I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
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