highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
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