Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize
