Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize