i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
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