Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
Come see our sink grown plant.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
Randomize
