I think I am morally bankrupt
He uses pillows to masturbate.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
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