I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
Randomize
