I am in a vortex of obligation.
babies were throwing up all over the place
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Drake has all the answers
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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