I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize