i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
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