I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
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