Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize
