it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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