If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
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